edit : can anyone see video via either link ? not appearing as a video on forum when i look
Last edited by Hardware on 24th Jun 2024 8:51 am. Edited 1 time in total
17th Jun 2024 8:49 pm
waterbuoy
Member Since: 26 Oct 2013
Location: Argyll
Posts: 2915
Both links work for me - assuming it is dogs with light sabres?Currently 2009 Disco 3 SE, 2013 MY D4 HSE and 2016 D4 SE
Previously:
TD5 Defender 110 CSW (230k miles)
300TDi Disco 1 (289k)
4 RR Classics (300-350k each, 2 manual, 2 auto)
110 V8 CSW (220k)
S3 109 hi cap pickup (ex RN)
S2A 88 Safari SW with lpg conversion (bloody lethal)
17th Jun 2024 9:04 pm
Rescue01
Member Since: 14 Jan 2008
Location: Aberdeen
Posts: 2514
Both links take you to YT to the video.Its probably something to do with the forum security update?Its not the height of the fall but the sudden stop at the bottom that hurts!!
17th Jun 2024 9:05 pm
Martin Site Admin and Owner
Member Since: 06 Nov 2004
Location: Hook Norton
Posts: 18560
YT 'shorts' don't embed06 D3 SE / 15 LR D90 XS SW / 88 LR 90 Td5 / 68 BMW 2000 ti
Any issues with the site let me know!
A duck walks into a pub and orders a pint of beer and a ham sandwich.
The barman looks at him and says,
"Hang on! You're a duck."
"I see your eyes are working," replies the duck.
"And you can talk" !!
Exclaims the barman.
"I see your ears are working, too,"
Says the duck.
"Now if you don't mind, can I have my beer and my sandwich please?"
"Certainly, sorry about that,"
Says the barman as he pulls the duck's pint.
"It's just we don't get many ducks in this pub. What are you doing around this way?"
"I'm working on the building site across the road," Explains the duck.
"I'm a plasterer."
The flabbergasted barman cannot believe the duck and wants to learn more, but takes the hint when the duck pulls out a newspaper from his bag and proceeds to read it.
So, the duck reads his paper, drinks his beer, eats his sandwich, bids the barman good day and leaves.
The same thing happens for two weeks.
Then one day the circus comes to town.
The ringmaster comes into the pub for a pint and the barman says to him
"You're with the circus, aren't you? Well, I know this duck that could be just brilliant in your circus. He talks, drinks beer, eats sandwiches, reads the newspaper and everything!"
"Sounds marvellous," says the ringmaster, handing over his business card.
"Get him to give me a call."
So the next day when the duck comes into the pub the barman says,
"Hey Mr Duck, I reckon I can line you up with a top job, paying really good money."
"I'm always looking for the next job,"
Says the duck.
"Where is it?"
"At the circus,"
Says the barman.
"The circus?"
Repeats the duck.
"That's right,"
Replies the barman.
"The circus?"
The duck asks again.
with the big tent?"
"Yeah," the barman replies.
"With all the animals who live in cages, and performers who live in caravans?" says the duck.
"Of course," the barman replies.
"And the tent has canvas sides and a big canvas roof with a hole in the middle?" persists the duck.
"That's right!" says the barman.
The duck shakes his head in amazement, and says
"What the hell would they want with a plasterer" ???
24th Jun 2024 7:39 am
gstuart
Member Since: 21 Oct 2016
Location: kent
Posts: 14113
For those of my generation who do not, and cannot, comprehend why Facebook exists: I am trying to make friends outside Facebook while applying the same principles.
Therefore, every day I walk down the street and tell passers-by what I have eaten, how I feel at the moment, what did the night before, what I will do later and with whom. I give them pictures of my family, my dog and of me gardening, taking things apart in the garage, watering the lawn, standing in front of landmarks, driving around town, having lunch, and doing what anybody and everybody does every day. I also listen to their conversations, give them “thumbs up” and tell them I “like” them.
And it works just like Facebook. I already have four people following me:
Two police officers, a private investigator and a psychiatrist.
26th Jun 2024 10:38 am
ruben D3 Decade
Member Since: 26 Sep 2006
Location: ASTURIAS
Posts: 2429
lost in translation!
DISCOVERY 3 SE man. TDV6 2006, my true love!
DEFENDER 2 SE D I6 MHEV 2024, other live.
26th Jun 2024 12:13 pm
gstuart
Member Since: 21 Oct 2016
Location: kent
Posts: 14113
🤣🤣
27th Jun 2024 12:49 am
DSL Keeper of the wheelie bin
Member Since: 11 May 2006
Location: Off again! :-)
Posts: 73075
Two prawns were swimming around in the sea one day. The first one was called Justin and the second one was called Kristian.
They were continually being chased and threatened by the sharks that inhabited the area.
Eventually Justin had had enough. He said to Kristian, "I'm fed up with being a prawn. I wish I was a shark, and then I wouldn't have to worry about being eaten all the time."
As he said this, a large mysterious cod appeared and said, "Your wish is granted!"
And believe it or not, with that Justin turned into a fearsome shark.
Kristian was horrified and so immediately swam away as he was scared of being eaten by his old friend.
As time went by, Justin found his new life as a shark to be boring and lonely. None of his old friends would let him get near them as they thought he would eat them and so they just swam away whenever he approached.
It took a while, but eventually Justin realized that his new menacing appearance was the cause of his sad plight.
Then one day he was swimming all alone as usual when he saw the mysterious cod again. He thought it'd be better if he could go back to his old life so he swam to the cod and begged to be changed back. The cod worked his magic and suddenly Justin was a prawn once more.
With tears of joy streaming down his cheeks Justin swam straight to Kristian's home.
As he opened the coral gate, the happy memories came flooding back. He banged on the door and shouted, "Kristian, it's me, Justin, your old friend. Come out and see me again."
Kristian replied, "No way! You're a shark now and you'll just eat me. I'm not being tricked into being your dinner."
Justin shouted back "No, I'm not a shark any more. That was the old me. I've changed...
I've found Cod. I'm a prawn again Kristian." 😁😁.
Dean
====================================
2011 D4 XS - OBD port protection, RLD spare wheel protector, All LED interiors lights, Timed Climate enabled, iiD tool paired.
2011 D4 Landmark - Stolen from same dealer before I paid for it
2011 D4 GS - Stolen whilst at dealer ... All LED interiors lights, DRLs, Spare Wheel protector.
1996 300Tdi - Eaten by tin worms
A 65 year old woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital.
While on the operating table she had a near death experience..
Seeing God she asked : "Is my time up ?"
God said : “No, you have another 33 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."
Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a Face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck.
She even had someone come in and change her hair colour and brighten her teeth !
Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well make the most of it.
After her last operation, she was discharged from the hospital.
While crossing the street on her way home, she was killed by an ambulance.
Arriving in front of God, she demanded :
"God, you said I had another 33 years to live ? Why didn't you pull me from out of the path of the Ambulance ?"
God replied :
"I didn't recognize you.......... !!!!!"
😂😂.
Dean
====================================
2011 D4 XS - OBD port protection, RLD spare wheel protector, All LED interiors lights, Timed Climate enabled, iiD tool paired.
2011 D4 Landmark - Stolen from same dealer before I paid for it
2011 D4 GS - Stolen whilst at dealer ... All LED interiors lights, DRLs, Spare Wheel protector.
1996 300Tdi - Eaten by tin worms
A friend of mine has 2 tickets for the euros final on Sunday He paid £300 each but he didn't realise when he bought them months ago that it was going to be the same day as his wedding!
If you are interested, he is looking for someone to take his place.
It's at Portsmouth Registry Office, at 4pm. The bride's name is Nicola -- she's 5'4", about 8 stone, quite pretty, has her own income and is a really good cook. 😂😂😂
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