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Bill Wright
Member Since: 03 Nov 2007
Location: Glorious Devon
Posts: 3254
  
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A vet received a phone call very late one Saturday night.
"Please come quick" a very agitated voice on the other end said. "My dog has swallowed a condom".
"Is he in distress?" the vet asked".
"You don't understand" the voice said. "My dog has swallowed a condom".
"Yes, but unless the thing has lodged in his throat it will probably pass through his system without harming the animal".
"Please come quick" the voice went on undeterred. "The dog has swallowed a condom and my girlfriend is getting very distressed".
Eventually the vet gave in and promised that he would come round right away.
He was just putting his coat on when the phone rang again.
"About the dog that swallowed the condom" said the voice, it was a lot calmer now...
"Panic over, we've found another one in the drawer"
 Never take life too seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.
D4 SDV6 SE Tech Kaikoura Stone MY15.
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 3rd Jul 2016 3:21 pm |
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Hairy Dan
Member Since: 19 Jan 2011
Location: Co. Durham
Posts: 12319
 
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  Cheers Ian
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Club N.E.R.D.S
Kielder 4x4 Safari
Discoless
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| 3rd Jul 2016 3:44 pm |
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muddywheels4wd
Member Since: 16 Dec 2010
Location: East Riding of Yorkshire
Posts: 1681
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Wanted a Series 2 LR since childhood but previously owned MY16 Disco Sport HSE TD4 Auto, MY13 RR Sport Black Edition TDV6 Auto, MY10 RR Sport HSE TDV6 Auto, 2007 Freelander 1 Freestyle TD4 Soft Top, 2009 Freelander 2 GS TD4 Auto, 2007 Freelander 2 GS TD4, 2004 Disco 2 Metropolis Auto, 2002 Disco 2 GS, 2000 Freelander 1 SE TD4 SW
Still hoping for a S2 one day!
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| 3rd Jul 2016 4:56 pm |
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lynalldiscovery
Member Since: 22 Dec 2009
Location: Maidstone
Posts: 7274
 
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Once we had a mad cat who decided to rub up against the vibrating wall as I was drilling it with a very long masonary bit and when the drill burst through 
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| 3rd Jul 2016 5:06 pm |
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muddywheels4wd
Member Since: 16 Dec 2010
Location: East Riding of Yorkshire
Posts: 1681
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 Wanted a Series 2 LR since childhood but previously owned MY16 Disco Sport HSE TD4 Auto, MY13 RR Sport Black Edition TDV6 Auto, MY10 RR Sport HSE TDV6 Auto, 2007 Freelander 1 Freestyle TD4 Soft Top, 2009 Freelander 2 GS TD4 Auto, 2007 Freelander 2 GS TD4, 2004 Disco 2 Metropolis Auto, 2002 Disco 2 GS, 2000 Freelander 1 SE TD4 SW
Still hoping for a S2 one day!
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| 3rd Jul 2016 5:07 pm |
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lynalldiscovery
Member Since: 22 Dec 2009
Location: Maidstone
Posts: 7274
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He lived for many years luckily (another 12 odd years Iirc), the drill got hold of his fur and ripped a hole in his skin, lucky for him he was a saggy fat bar steward, when I rang the vets I thought the girl who answered was going to vomit  the vet removed some bits of concrete from inside his skin and away he went.
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| 3rd Jul 2016 5:13 pm |
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muddywheels4wd
Member Since: 16 Dec 2010
Location: East Riding of Yorkshire
Posts: 1681
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Wow
Wanted a Series 2 LR since childhood but previously owned MY16 Disco Sport HSE TD4 Auto, MY13 RR Sport Black Edition TDV6 Auto, MY10 RR Sport HSE TDV6 Auto, 2007 Freelander 1 Freestyle TD4 Soft Top, 2009 Freelander 2 GS TD4 Auto, 2007 Freelander 2 GS TD4, 2004 Disco 2 Metropolis Auto, 2002 Disco 2 GS, 2000 Freelander 1 SE TD4 SW
Still hoping for a S2 one day!
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| 3rd Jul 2016 6:25 pm |
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lynalldiscovery
Member Since: 22 Dec 2009
Location: Maidstone
Posts: 7274
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He was as stupid as stupid gets and would go to anyone for a stroke, one day he went to a bloke with a pitbull, he didnt survive that.
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| 3rd Jul 2016 7:08 pm |
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muddywheels4wd
Member Since: 16 Dec 2010
Location: East Riding of Yorkshire
Posts: 1681
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That's really sad 
I hope the guy with the pitbull was dealt with for not controlling his dog  Wanted a Series 2 LR since childhood but previously owned MY16 Disco Sport HSE TD4 Auto, MY13 RR Sport Black Edition TDV6 Auto, MY10 RR Sport HSE TDV6 Auto, 2007 Freelander 1 Freestyle TD4 Soft Top, 2009 Freelander 2 GS TD4 Auto, 2007 Freelander 2 GS TD4, 2004 Disco 2 Metropolis Auto, 2002 Disco 2 GS, 2000 Freelander 1 SE TD4 SW
Still hoping for a S2 one day!
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| 3rd Jul 2016 7:23 pm |
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lynalldiscovery
Member Since: 22 Dec 2009
Location: Maidstone
Posts: 7274
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Sadly we didnt know about it until our elderly neighbour came and told us as she had seen it happen out of her window, bloke with dog was long gone not to be seen again.
Weve had loads of cats over the years all old hand me downs rescue jobs, some real weirdos and some real cute ones, its always the same at their end wife cant see they have had it and I have to really push the point she is making them suffer by letting them carry on, she does agree with me in the end though, theres two currently on their last legs, one actually looks like hes feral, messy fur and back arched so far down you would think he had a saddle, he spends his entire day guarding the end of our road.
We did have one posh rescue cat some sort of pure breed thing and he got catnapped weirdly wife wasnt to concerned and she said if they wanted him that bad they will hopefully look after him and thats all that matters.
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| 4th Jul 2016 5:58 am |
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