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Tuesday humor 2
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flinty99
 


Member Since: 17 Mar 2008
Location: Northumberland
Posts: 2558

England 
Tuesday humor 2

A Russian couple were walking down the street in Moscow one night, when the man felt a drop hit his nose.

"I think it's raining," he said to his wife.

"No, that felt more like snow to me," she replied.

"No, I'm sure it was just rain," he said.

Well, as these things go, they were about to have a major argument about whether it was raining or snowing. Just then they saw a minor communist party official walking toward them.

"Let's not fight about it," the man said, "Let's ask Comrade Rudolph whether it's officially raining or snowing."

As the official approached, the man asked, "Tell us, Comrade Rudolph, is it officially raining or snowing?"

"It's raining, of course," he answered, and walked on. But the woman insisted, "I know that felt like snow!"

To which the man replied, "Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."
  
Post #39207523rd Dec 2008 5:08 pm
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ELD70
 


Member Since: 28 Jan 2008
Location: Romford.
Posts: 901

United Kingdom 2007 Discovery 3 TDV6 SE Auto Java BlackDiscovery 3

I asked the wife last night to rate our love making from one to ten, with ten being the best. She replied that she was not good with fractions. Big Cry
  
Post #39208923rd Dec 2008 5:19 pm
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adam
 


Member Since: 20 Sep 2005
Location: Home and Happy
Posts: 6917

United Kingdom 

Two Aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.






The ceremony was rubbish but the Reception was brilliant.
  
Post #39209123rd Dec 2008 5:24 pm
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AndrewW
 


Member Since: 06 Aug 2007
Location: Saddleworth
Posts: 2302

United Kingdom 2016 Discovery 4 3.0 SDV6 Graphite LE Auto Orkney GreyDiscovery 4

A jumper cable walks into a bar.

The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything..."
 2006 D3 finally swapped for a 2016 D4 Graphite in Graphite grey. No mods  
Post #39209623rd Dec 2008 5:31 pm
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AndrewW
 


Member Since: 06 Aug 2007
Location: Saddleworth
Posts: 2302

United Kingdom 2016 Discovery 4 3.0 SDV6 Graphite LE Auto Orkney GreyDiscovery 4

Invisible man marries invisible woman.

The kids were nothing to look at.
 2006 D3 finally swapped for a 2016 D4 Graphite in Graphite grey. No mods  
Post #39209723rd Dec 2008 5:32 pm
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ELD70
 


Member Since: 28 Jan 2008
Location: Romford.
Posts: 901

United Kingdom 2007 Discovery 3 TDV6 SE Auto Java BlackDiscovery 3

Guy knocked on my front door last night collecting donations towards the new local swimming pool, gave him a glass of water.
  
Post #39209823rd Dec 2008 5:34 pm
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Bodsy
Site Sponsor 


Member Since: 06 Nov 2006
Location: In the Clubhouse
Posts: 21361

United Kingdom 2007 Discovery 3 TDV6 HSE Auto Java BlackDiscovery 3

Where's cdodkin then........?


Laughing Wink
 Bodsys Brake Bible

D4/D3 Remote FBH heat kits
BAS Remaps/ EGR Blank
Transmission Flush
Software updates/enabling


Clock/ SNOTM /3Flash / 4x4Info /BT Update /Service Reset/Error Codes / Gearbox Reset
See It Here 
 
Post #39210123rd Dec 2008 5:36 pm
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AndrewW
 


Member Since: 06 Aug 2007
Location: Saddleworth
Posts: 2302

United Kingdom 2016 Discovery 4 3.0 SDV6 Graphite LE Auto Orkney GreyDiscovery 4

He went to a seafood disco - and pulled a mussel Whistle
 2006 D3 finally swapped for a 2016 D4 Graphite in Graphite grey. No mods  
Post #39211023rd Dec 2008 5:46 pm
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AndrewW
 


Member Since: 06 Aug 2007
Location: Saddleworth
Posts: 2302

United Kingdom 2016 Discovery 4 3.0 SDV6 Graphite LE Auto Orkney GreyDiscovery 4

Found the one I wanted... Very Happy

Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath.
This made him (Oh, man, this is so bad, it's good)..... A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
 2006 D3 finally swapped for a 2016 D4 Graphite in Graphite grey. No mods  
Post #39211523rd Dec 2008 5:52 pm
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Bodsy
Site Sponsor 


Member Since: 06 Nov 2006
Location: In the Clubhouse
Posts: 21361

United Kingdom 2007 Discovery 3 TDV6 HSE Auto Java BlackDiscovery 3

Rolling Eyes Rolling Eyes Rolling Eyes Rolling Eyes Thud


Man are you sure you don't have a brother in the states...... Big Cry Big Cry
 Bodsys Brake Bible

D4/D3 Remote FBH heat kits
BAS Remaps/ EGR Blank
Transmission Flush
Software updates/enabling


Clock/ SNOTM /3Flash / 4x4Info /BT Update /Service Reset/Error Codes / Gearbox Reset
See It Here 
 
Post #39211823rd Dec 2008 5:55 pm
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AndrewW
 


Member Since: 06 Aug 2007
Location: Saddleworth
Posts: 2302

United Kingdom 2016 Discovery 4 3.0 SDV6 Graphite LE Auto Orkney GreyDiscovery 4

...and...

Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal? His goal: transcend dental medication.
 2006 D3 finally swapped for a 2016 D4 Graphite in Graphite grey. No mods  
Post #39213123rd Dec 2008 6:09 pm
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frogall
 


Member Since: 29 Aug 2008
Location: Norfolk
Posts: 250

United Kingdom 2006 Discovery 3 TDV6 S Manual Tonga GreenDiscovery 3

Two blondes walked into a bar.....

You'd think one of them would've seen it.
 I'm on a whisky diet. I've lost three days already.  
Post #39217223rd Dec 2008 7:02 pm
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