At last Gordon Brown decided to throw the towel in and resign. His cabinet colleagues decided it would be a worthy gesture to name a railway locomotive after him. So a senior 'Sir Humphrey' went from Whitehall to the National Railway Museum at York, to investigate the possibilities.
"They have a number of locomotives at the NRM without names," a specially-sought consultant told the top civil servant. "Mostly freight locomotives though."
"Oh dear, that's not very fitting for a prime minister," said Sir Humphrey. "How about that big green one, over there ?" he said, pointing to 4472 Flying Scotsman.
"That's already got a name" said the consultant. "It's called 'Flying Scotsman'."
"Oh. Couldn't it be renamed ?" asked Sir Humphrey. "This is a national museum after all, funded by the taxpayer."
"I suppose it might be considered," said the consultant. "After all the LNER renamed a number of their locomotives after directors of the company, and even renamed one of them Dwight D Eisenhower."
"That's excellent", said Sir Humphrey, "So that's settled then...let's look at renaming 4472. But how much will it cost ? We can't spend too much, given the expenses scandal !"
"Well", said the consultant, "Why don't we just paint out the 'F'?"The older I get, the more I realise that people confuse wrinkles for wisdom
Founder member of Club FFRRV
Club Orange, Mint or Fruit
Club Walnut Sniffers
11th Aug 2009 5:48 pm
SJR
Member Since: 09 Aug 2006
Location: East Manchester
Posts: 4030
I believe that every human has a finite number of heart-beats. I don't intend to waste any of mine running around doing exercises.
Buzz Aldrin (1930 -
Sold: HSE-G4, Tangiers Orange. (one of your 5 Discoverys a day)
Member of CFT
12th Aug 2009 9:03 am
stapldm
Member Since: 11 Sep 2006
Location: Swine Town
Posts: 2330
JMC, that's brilliant.
You've successfully ruined my screen and knackered my keyboard.
Any tips on getting Alpen out of the keyboard when the airduster wont shift it?Dr. Ian Malcolm:
"Yeah, but your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should."
Transgenic tomato anyone?
12th Aug 2009 9:32 am
SJR
Member Since: 09 Aug 2006
Location: East Manchester
Posts: 4030
stapldm wrote:
Any tips on getting Alpen out of the keyboard when the airduster wont shift it?
you could always add more milk to soften it further to see if that makes is easier to remove I believe that every human has a finite number of heart-beats. I don't intend to waste any of mine running around doing exercises.
Buzz Aldrin (1930 -
12th Aug 2009 9:33 am
robsmith
Member Since: 02 Sep 2007
Location: Staffordshire
Posts: 2394
Tried that some time ago
It doesn't work as the dusty stuff becomes like glue and its even harder to get rid of.
At least with cornflakes you've only got big, no-adhering lumps to get rid of.
Curry is even worse - not saying how I know, but take it from me, it makes any form of cereal look very tame.
But if you really want to destroy a keyboard PepsiMax or Coca-Cola are tops Rob Smith
Silver rools OK
12th Aug 2009 1:14 pm
stapldm
Member Since: 11 Sep 2006
Location: Swine Town
Posts: 2330
Thanks for the top advice; Based on that I've opted for letting it dry out and typing harder until it fragments into dust
Curry!!!???? The mind boggles Dr. Ian Malcolm:
"Yeah, but your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should."
Transgenic tomato anyone?
12th Aug 2009 2:23 pm
robsmith
Member Since: 02 Sep 2007
Location: Staffordshire
Posts: 2394
Don't, please don't, ask
Waste of a good curry, and a good (expensive) keyboard Rob Smith
Silver rools OK
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