Member Since: 12 Dec 2005
Location: The Gaff
Posts: 50979
The Squeak
So I get in the motor on Thursday evening to run pointless errands for SWMBO ...as I drive down the road I have a new squeak ...it was a tiny squeak at ear height which therefore made it the loudest and most irritating squeak in the entire universe.
As I was driving along I identified that it was in the offside B pillar somewhere around the seatbelt height adjuster. I whacked it a few times in the unrealistic hope it would disappear. No.
I pulled into a layby got out and started to fiddle with the height adjuster ...a few more whacks to boot ...that must solve it. No . A bit further down the road I pull into a car park by the A3 where clearly an enchanting evening of dogging and gulling was about to commence. Undeterred by the flashing of headlamps I got out ...opened the doors and quickly started pulling .....this squeak was going to get it
The door rubbers and bottom A pillar trim came off quite quickly but the top trim was much more of a challenge.....eventually though with lots of swearing it came off and I started to inspect the seat belt connections, the spring, the slider controls ...it must be here damn it ...I started rocking the motor as hard as I could in an attempt to replicate ...nothing ...I put the panels and rubbers back with a gusto ...whacking them back into place. I could hear electric windows going up and central locking systems clunking around me as I'm sure they had never seen such a peculiar display of "slapping" before.
I drove off. The squeak was still there.
I'm now driving along with my ear up against the pillar ...it is in there godammit
I repeat the whole dismantling exercise again this time in the car park of Sainsburys. Shoppers gawping on ...the trolley boy asking me if I'm "allright" ....course I'm not allright ....I've got a squeak FFS
Driving home ...Jo Whiley on full blast but I could still hear it ....the resignation of having to take the motor in began to fill my mind ...Oh no ...I'm defeated
Got home and opened the rear door to pick up my carrier bags of delicacies to keep the wife happy.. ...in leaning down to pick up a packet of rolls that had made an escape from a bag to under my seat my arm touched the back of the seat ....then the squeak ...it was the squeak ...the squeak . YES
The lessons here chaps ....Dogging looks like fun ...Don't believe your ears ever ......and most of all don't let anyone put a 1/3rd filled plastic water bottle in the bottom of the rear pocket of your seat 21 year LR veteran > D2 GS 2003 > D3 S 2006 > D3 HSE 2009 > D4 HSE 2013 > D4 HSE 2015 > D5 HSE 2018 > DS HSE R-Dynamic P300e 2021
11th Jul 2015 9:49 am
SHARKYSHARKS
Member Since: 20 Dec 2008
Location: Saddleworth Oldham
Posts: 1954
''opened the doors and quickly started pulling "
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11th Jul 2015 11:29 am
albal
Member Since: 31 Jul 2011
Location: Southampton
Posts: 592
Just think you might not have found the water bottle so soon. See it saved you taking out the whole interior
11th Jul 2015 11:34 am
Disco dazboy
Member Since: 02 Dec 2013
Location: Leicestershire
Posts: 1782
SHARKYSHARKS wrote:
''opened the doors and quickly started pulling "
D3 x2 now gone
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11th Jul 2015 11:36 am
747_JK
Member Since: 03 Apr 2010
Location: Surrey
Posts: 268
Did you dictate that to a 10 year old to type? More emoticon use than a whatsapp message from my young niece... And I thought that was excessive!
Glad you got your water issues sorted.747_JK
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11th Jul 2015 12:14 pm
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Member Since: 12 Dec 2005
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. A bit further down the road I pull into a car park by the A3 where clearly an enchanting evening of dogging and gulling was about to commence. Undeterred by the flashing of headlamps I got out ...opened the doors and quickly started pulling .....this squeak was going to get it 
squeak was still there. 
....course I'm not 
...it was the squeak 
...the 
...Don't believe your ears ever 
....like this 
