Discoeast
Member Since: 19 Feb 2008
Location: Boksburg
Posts: 800
  
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#6--It was mealtime during a flight on Hooters Airline. "Would you like
dinner?" the flight attendant asked John, seated in front.
'What are my choices?' John asked.
'Yes or No,' she replied.
#5--A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets.
As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened
his trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat, she said,
'Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub.'
#4--The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding
rolled down his window. 'I've been waiting for you all day,' the cop said.
The kid replied, 'Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could.'
When the cop finally stopped laughing , he sent the kid on his way
without a ticket.
#3--A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at a grocery store
but she couldn't find one big enough for her family.
She asked the stock boy, 'Do these turkeys get any bigger?'
The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they'er all dead.'
#2--A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up
that reads,'Low Bridge overhead.' Before he knows it, the bridge is
right ahead of him and gets stuck under it. Cars are backed up for
miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car
and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says,
'Got stuck, huh?' The driver says,'No, I was delivering this bridge
and ran out of gas.'
#1--A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam.
'Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here
tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or serious personal
injury, illness, or death in your immediate family, but that's it,
no other excuses whatsoever!'
A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and
asked,'What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering
from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?'
The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering.
When silence is restored, the teacher smiles knowingly
at the student, shakes her head and sweetly says,
'Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand.' D3 bullbar-spots-roof rack with spots-ladder-long range tank-swing out spare wheel carrier- upgraded tow bar-dash console-internal water tank-duel awnings-drawer system & T T.
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 19th Feb 2009 8:50 pm |
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heine
Member Since: 07 Feb 2007
Location: Midrand
Posts: 4054
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| 19th Feb 2009 9:59 pm |
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Maverick
Member Since: 25 Jul 2007
Location: Lost on the misty mountain hop!
Posts: 2580
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#1 especially! Ben
1996 Defender 90 300 TDi
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| 19th Feb 2009 10:20 pm |
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