This is so good I had to pinch it from another forum, cheers
Dino Not sure if you have seen it yet....
The British are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats in Islamabad and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross". Brits have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to a "Bloody Nuisance". The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the great fire of 1666.
The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide". The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender". The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France 's white flag factory, effectively paralysing the country's military capability.
It's not only the French who are on a heightened level of alert. Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout loudly and excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing". Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides".
The Germans also increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose".
Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels .
The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.
And at the other end of the world:
Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to "She'll be right, mate". Three more escalation levels remain: "Crikey!", "I think we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend" and "The barbie is cancelled". There has not been a situation yet that has warranted the use of the final escalation level.I am a hob nobber.
17th Jun 2009 2:32 pm
BORDER ROVER
Member Since: 03 Dec 2007
Location: Cumbria
Posts: 1105
POT NOODLE NAVIGATION CHALLENGE 2010 WINNER
Club Sankey
Club pie and peas
17th Jun 2009 3:29 pm
heine
Member Since: 07 Feb 2007
Location: Midrand
Posts: 4054
Seen another version before, but it is still a good laugh
"I know that you believe that you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize that what you read is not what I meant"
17th Jun 2009 10:21 pm
DSL Keeper of the wheelie bin
Member Since: 11 May 2006
Location: Off again! :-)
Posts: 72788
17th Jun 2009 10:27 pm
DSL Keeper of the wheelie bin
Member Since: 11 May 2006
Location: Off again! :-)
Posts: 72788
Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels .
Waaaahhhhheyyyyy, my 1st cut and paste with the iPhone!!!!
17th Jun 2009 10:29 pm
Spooky
Member Since: 02 Jun 2009
Location: Swindon, Wilts
Posts: 1013
Regards,
Mick
- 2014 SDV8 Autobiography
- 'Vincent' - 2010 TdV8 Vogue SE
- 'Molly' - 2005 HSE Auto
'Dixie' - 2000 D2 Td5 ES
17th Jun 2009 11:25 pm
Bushwanderer
Member Since: 27 Nov 2007
Location: Northern Rivers, NSW, Australia
Posts: 2050
You cannot post new topics in this forum You cannot reply to topics in this forum You cannot edit your posts in this forum You cannot delete your posts in this forum You cannot vote in polls in this forum